


The Latest and Greatest Lame Campaign

by tbmd1066



Series: Carpet Burns and Carousels [6]
Category: Merlin (TV)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Arthur Knows About Merlin's Magic (Merlin), Arthur and Merlin snooping, Canon Era, Humour and Hijinks, Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Post-Magic Reveal, because when will I not hurt these boys lmao, don't worry too much about the summary Leon is still an option, it's fine this barely counts
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-08-14
Updated: 2020-08-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 19:46:58
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,757
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25900810
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/tbmd1066/pseuds/tbmd1066
Summary: "I know it's one of the round table knights. Leon swears it's not him, and I believe him. But the rest of them are still a possibility."Merlin nodded. He had also assumed that it would be one of the knights they'd all grown close with—Arthur's unofficial inner circle."I just wish whoever it is had asked my father or me before they started courting Morgana."
Relationships: Gwen/Lancelot (Merlin), Merlin/Arthur Pendragon (Merlin), Morgana/Someone (Merlin)
Series: Carpet Burns and Carousels [6]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1769542
Comments: 13
Kudos: 193





	The Latest and Greatest Lame Campaign

Merlin looked up from the floating pot he was stirring as Morgana entered the room. "Hey, where have you been? We were waiting." 

"Sorry, got held up." Morgana looked flushed, and her hair was falling out of her braid. Merlin couldn't help but notice her lipstick was smeared, as well. He made quick eye contact with her and tapped the corner of his mouth. Her eyes went wide, and she quickly wiped at her mouth.

"Did you have lunch without us?" Arthur pouted. "It's magic training day, we always have lunch together."

"I can have lunch with other people if I want to, Arthur, you aren't my keeper." Morgana snapped. "Where were we, Merlin? Potionwork?"

"Um, yeah." 

"Great, because I was looking it over, and I actually had a question about one of the ingredients."

"Sure, what—"

"So who were you having lunch with, then, if not us?" Arthur interrupted.

"It's none of your business, Arthur," Morgana hissed and looked back to Merlin. "It's about moondust. I'm not sure exactly what that is."

Merlin smiled. "Oh, that's a great question. You see, moondust—"

"It's just that if you're going to blow us off, I think it would be polite to let us know who you're seeing instead."

"I'm not seeing anyone, just lay off. Sorry, Merlin, go on."

"Er, right, um, so moondust is—"

"Are you sure you're not  _ seeing _ anyone, Morgana?"

"What are you implying?"

"Nothing, nothing..." Arthur said airily. "It's just that you love magic training days, so it must be someone pretty important, to divert you. And someone you're  _ close _ with, if you ended 'lunch' with your hair like that."

Morgana's eyes opened wide, and she advanced on her brother with a pointed finger. "Bēo sum padde!" In a flash, the prince vanished and was replaced by a remarkably ugly yellow toad. 

Merlin groaned. "Not again..."

"Oh, you can fix it," she grumbled. 

"Not really the point."

"You know, why don't you take Arthur," she picked up the toad with two fingers and plopped him unceremoniously in Merlin's outstretched hand. "And go. We'll meet again on Monday."

"But—" Morgana started shoving him towards the door. 

"Good _ bye _ , Merlin." And...slam. Merlin glared down at the toad in his hand.

"You need to be nicer to your sister."

* * *

"Merlin, I need your help with something," Arthur announced over breakfast the next day. Merlin had un-toaded him, but the green shirt he was wearing wasn't doing him any favours. Merlin made a mental note to have him change before dinner. 

"Unsurprising, you need my help with most things." 

"I need you to tell me who Morgana's suitor is." 

The problem with that was that Merlin actually didn't know. Usually, he was quite keen on castle gossip. He'd tried to find out about who Morgana was seeing, but had gotten nowhere. It was pretty frustrating. He had his hunches, but nothing concrete. 

"Why are you asking me?" 

"Because you always know about these things. I assume Morgana would have told you." 

Merlin frowned. He would have assumed that, too. "Well, sorry to disappoint, but she hasn't. I have no idea who it is." 

"I know it's one of the round table knights. Leon swears it's not him, and I believe him. But the rest of them are still a possibility." 

Merlin nodded. He had also assumed that it would be one of the knights they'd all grown close with—Arthur's unofficial inner circle. 

"I just wish whoever it is had asked my father or me before they started courting Morgana."

Merlin simply nodded. People hadn't been asking Uther about much of anything in a while. Arthur had been doing a wonderful job as regent, but his being Morgana's guardian was a touchy subject between the two siblings. Morgana would never have wanted a suitor to ask Arthur's permission to court her. As long as said suitor respected her wishes more than Arthur's, Merlin thought he'd probably do quite well, whoever he was. 

"Look, if we put our heads together, I'm sure we can figure it out."

"Yes, yes, good idea. Which of them is it most likely to be?"

"Well, Gwaine flirts with her a lot." 

"Gwaine flirts with everyone, that doesn't mean anything." "Right..." Merlin pursed his lips. "What's her type, then?" 

Arthur stared at him blankly. 

"You know, is she into the strong silent type, or the mysterious sort, or the handsome flirt?"

"You think Gwaine is handsome?"

"I...the point is, does Morgana think Gwaine's handsome?" Merlin deflected quite artfully, he thought. 

"Morgana and Gwaine?" Arthur frowned. "I can't see it."

"I can. I think they could work well together."

"Why?"

"Well, they're different, but in complementary ways."

"Because she's uptight and he's irresponsible?"

"Not how I would have phrased it, but maybe he could get Morgana to calm down a little, and she could get him to take things more seriously."

"Or they could just drive each other crazy and make everything much worse." 

"Or it could be Elyan. If they married, it would make her and Gwen sisters." 

"As much as she'd love that, I doubt it's reason enough for her to court him."

Merlin nodded. "True, but he has other redeeming qualities, too." 

"What about Percival? He's quiet, and she's opinionated. Could work nicely."

"Not so much for Percival," Merlin laughed.

"Unless he agrees with her opinions, which he usually does."

"Yeah, well, so does Leon, and you said it's not him. Which, by the way, I'm not so sure of. They're very fond of each other."

"That's only because they've known each other for so long. Leon's like a brother to us."

"Mhmm. To you, sure."

"Don't be ridiculous, Merlin, why would Leon lie to me?"

"Could be because he's nervous to tell you he's courting your sister."

"That's absurd. I said when I asked him that I would be honoured to have him court Morgana."

"Did you say it in that tone?"

"I..." Arthur paused in thought. "It doesn't matter, it's not Leon. We'll be able to tell who it is at the meeting."

No one knew it, but the Knights of the Round Table were the real council of Camelot. As the only ones who knew about Merlin and Morgana's magic, they met during crises to figure out how to actually handle things. Sometimes, though, they held meetings just to throw off the official council. In fact, Merlin thought, the lack of an emergency was probably why Arthur was poking around for trouble with Morgana in the first place. Together, though, Merlin and Arthur ought to have been able to observe and figure out who Morgana's paramour was. 

It would be simple.

* * *

It was nice to sit at the round table, with all of their close friends. No one questioned why Merlin sat directly on Arthur's left because they all knew. The round table was meant to symbolize equality, but the seating arrangement did still matter. Morgana sat on Arthur's right, as she was his right hand. Merlin sitting on his left, however, signified that he was closest to the prince's heart. Not having to hide their relationship from their friends was a relatively new thing, and Merlin loved it. According to Lancelot, it had been completely obvious to anyone with half a brain anyway, but it was still nice. Merlin could only hope that Morgana would be just as obvious with her affections. He and Arthur watched carefully as she arrived fashionably late to the meeting.

"Lady Morgana, looking radiant, as always." 

"Sir Gwaine," Merlin flinched at the coolness in Morgana's voice. "With such a flattering tongue, I'm surprised that you don't have a gaggle of girls at your elbow all the time." Merlin winced. That was a trap, and Gwaine was a fool if he didn't see it. 

"Ah, well, such is the tragedy of my life; I fall in love with everyone, and yet no one falls in love with me."

"Perhaps you should stop falling in love with such wise people."

"Always so disdainful, Lady Morgana."

"It just comes so easily when you're around."

Merlin leaned over to Arthur. "I don't think it's Gwaine."

Lancelot, seated at Merlin's left, leaned over, too. "What are we whispering about?" he whispered.

"Nothing. Shh," Arthur whispered back.

"There's no need to listen to him, then, Lady Morgana." Elyan smiled at her. 

"Indeed not. When he enjoys the sound of his own voice so much, he hardly needs an audience."

Elyan laughed, perhaps a little too loudly. Merlin noticed that Percival also smiled at Morgana, even as he patted Gwaine's shoulder sympathetically. Leon pulled her chair out for her. 

"Thank you, Leon."

"My lady." He spoke softly and nodded politely. He then sat at her right. Which was his usual chair, and there was nothing odd about it. Arthur glanced over at Merlin, who raised an eyebrow. With Morgana right there, they really couldn't keep gossiping. Gwaine took a seat next to Leon, and Percival sat between Gwaine and Elyan. They were all looking at Morgana.

This was going to be more challenging than Merlin had first thought. 

* * *

"They all fancy her!" Arthur shouted as soon as they got back to their chambers. 

Merlin sighed and crossed the room to the wardrobe. "It would certainly seem that way."

"And not one of them had the courage to tell me about it. Cowards!" 

Merlin opened the wardrobe and searched around for the shirt he wanted. "Well, in fairness, only one of them is actually courting her, so only one is a coward. Come here." Arthur stopped pacing and walked over, lifting his arms for Merlin to change his shirt. 

"I think it's Percival."

"Why? All he did was smile at her."

Merlin pictured it for a moment, and something clicked. Not the realization that Morgana and Percy were in love, no, but something far better. An opportunity to tease Arthur.

"Oh," Merlin grinned. "I get it. You like the idea of the dark-haired, powerful mage and their muscular, blonde arm candy, is that it?"

"Wha, I don't..." Arthur spluttered.

"I asked you what  _ Morgana's  _ type is, not mine, dear."

"That is not what I... I didn't... I'm not  _ arm candy!"  _

"No?"

"No!"

"Dressed like that?" Merlin nodded toward's Arthur's gold-embroidered shirt. Arthur flushed a flattering red shade as if he were trying to match his cloak. 

"I am the crown prince of Camelot, I am  _ not _ arm candy."

"Hm."

"You picked this shirt!" 

"Yes, I did," Merlin smirked. It was perfect for the dinner Arthur was hosting for a visiting nobleman and his wife. It also had the added benefit of looking very attractive on Arthur. Sometimes Merlin really enjoyed his job. 

* * *

Morgana and Arthur had done a good job behaving like adults during dinner. Merlin had nearly been fooled into believing that it would continue. The visiting lord and his wife seemed to be influencing them to act like the up and coming leaders of the nation that they were, rather than quarrelling children. Merlin had been proud until Arthur snuck out when he and Gwen were fetching the second course. 

"Hello, Guinevere." Merlin rolled his eyes. Even after a year of sitting at the round table, Arthur and Gwen were still so formal with one another. 

"Your highness? Do you need something?"

"Er, well, no, not exactly," Arthur's stammering made it clear that he hadn't planned what to say to Gwen. "But I did want to ask you something." 

"You want me to tell you who Morgana's suitor is."

"What...? No... Do you know who he is?"

"She's been busy, we haven't talked about much lately."

Now that Merlin hadn't been expecting. "She didn't say anything at the meeting?" he asked. 

Gwen shot him an icy glare. "Between you two and Lancelot whispering and Elyan bickering with Gwaine, no, I didn't hear much from Morgana during the meeting."

"Would you at least tell us if it's Elyan?" asked Arthur.

"If you'll excuse us, your highness, Merlin and I have a dinner to serve." Gwen curtsied, and Arthur bowed and headed off back into the dining hall. As soon as the door closed behind him, Merlin turned back to Gwen. 

"Do you really not know who it is?" he asked. 

"Of course I know," Gwen scoffed. "But Morgana asked me not to say anything. It's been very stressful, don't push it." With that, she pushed the door to the dining hall open, and Merlin decided it would best for his health to give up. 

* * *

They had barely been back from dinner twenty minutes when Morgana barged into their chambers. 

"What have you been up to all day?" Morgana's question was more of an accusation than a polite inquiry. 

"Nothing!" Arthur jumped to say, sounding incredibly guilty. "What have you been up to?"

Morgana's eyes narrowed. "Gwen told me what you asked her."

Merlin winced. "We're sorry for prying, Morgana, we were just curious."

"It's none of your business!" she snapped. 

"I think it is my business, actually," Arthur snarled right back. 

"You already know that he's one of the round table knights, that's as good as you're getting. You trust those men, right?"

"Of course I do!"

"Then you don't need to worry!"

"I know that!" Arthur shouted... and then crumpled. Merlin saw his face fall, and his shoulders cave as he sat on the edge of his mattress. "You're my dearest friend," he said softly. "I don't understand why you want to keep this a secret from me." 

Morgana sighed. She sat with Arthur and crossed her arms. "I'm not going to tell you," she said in a firm but calm voice.

"But—"

"I'm not telling you because it's new, and it's not even that serious yet, but I don't want you scaring him off. I can scare him just fine on my own if needed."

"I know." 

"I don't need you to be so protective of me." 

"I know! But you're my sister, and I'm supposed to look out for you, especially with father..." Arthur's voice cracked. 

Something that had been wound tight in Merlin's chest unravelled. Of course, this was about Uther. Arthur had been feeling helpless for a while; no wonder he was trying to micromanage his sister. Merlin didn't want to interrupt their moment, but his magic pulled him towards Arthur so fast he nearly tripped. He sat next to his soulmate and took one of his hands. Morgana sighed and put an arm around her brother's shoulders. "I know you're strong," Arthur said. "You're being so strong right now, and I don't understand how." 

"He's going to be okay," she lied. She and Merlin both knew how bad Uther's health had been getting over the last month. It would take a great deal more than Gaius was capable of to pull him back now. 

"What if he's not?"

Morgana took a deep breath. "Then I'll still be here. And so will Merlin, and the rest of the round table. We'll still be a family."

"Some more so than others," Arthur said pointedly.

Morgana groaned. "I'll tell you someday. Once I figure out if it's going to last. Plus," she smiled. "It's fun driving you barmy." 

"You're the worst," Arthur tucked his head onto Morgana's shoulder. 

"Yeah, well, if you keep prying, I'm going to turn you into a toad again."

"Twice in as many days can't be good for you," Merlin said. "Better leave it."

"Fine," Arthur laughed. "Have your secret, Gana."

They sat together quietly for a minute. It felt peaceful, which was rare with the Pendragon siblings. Merlin smiled and placed a kiss on Arthur's shoulder. 

"You know," Arthur said. "If you turn  _ him _ into a toad, at least you'll be able to figure out if he's the one." Arthur and Merlin laughed. Morgana did not. "Morgana? ...Morgana, you didn't."

"It was an accident! He deserved it, though. And then I thought I'd try kissing him, just to see if it worked, and it did... So..." 

"So he's your true love," Arthur finished. "Hard to argue with that." 

"Believe me, I tried."

"You like him, though, don't you?" Arthur looked up, still concerned.

"Yeah," she smiled. "I really do.

"Good." Arthur nodded. "Good." He leaned back on Morgana's shoulder, and Merlin leaned into him until all three of them tilted over, laughing like idiots. Merlin lay on top of them for a minute, not really listening to Morgana and Arthur shouting, but simply enjoying the moment. Even as ridiculous as they were, he couldn't have asked for a better family. 

**Author's Note:**

> Some thoughts:   
> Me: Why are you keeping this a secret, though, actually?  
> Morgana: You thought it'd be funny  
> Me: Ah, yes. I was right. 
> 
> List of fics now in my wips: Morgana turns Arthur into a toad for the first time and it takes them way too long to figure out that True Love's Kiss is the solution; young Merlin talks to his mum about magic and how he sees the world and it's so cute; Gwen and Lancelot have a baby and everyone loves it, Morgana reveals who her True Love actually is.
> 
> On that topic, who is Morgana's True Love? Vote now on your phones. (There is a correct answer but I'm not 100% sold on it) 
> 
> Spells used:  
> "Bēo sum padde!" Be a toad.
> 
> Title is from The Amazing Devil's song "Pruning Shears."


End file.
